Yeah I said it! But no, Eddy hasn't gone sexist on you! Now that I have your undivided attention, here's what I really meant to say, "Why Women Shouldn't Be Forced To Work When Pregnant." You'll see where I'm coming from by the end of this article so bear with me.
Recently we experienced somewhat of a sever winter ice storm here in New York. My wife and I live in the suburbs. God that feels so weird to say as a former Bronx Bomber! In any event, as nice as it is living in the suburbs when it comes to winter weather, we get the doodie end of the stick.
So when this ice storm hit New York City, it was far worst in the suburbs. The sanitation department is slower to react here and honestly most businesses just shut down. That's just the way it is. But in New York City, it takes more than Mother Nature to shut it down. Furthermore it just doesn't get as bad.
So my wife is about 8 months pregnant and works in the city as we like to call it. She struggled to get up, as usual. Then prepared to go to work. Ever since "knocking her up" (Yeah, yeah I know it's not the proper term.), I've become very protective. Before that, not so much. (Just kidding.) But I am definitely a lot more protective of her now that she's carrying my first baby girl. So I wasn't really keen on the idea of her trekking out in those conditions. But I just kept it to myself and said a quiet prayer as I was brushing my teeth that she would get to work safely. (Sorry about the morning breath God.)
2 minutes later she was back in the house. Apparently, she damn near fell up the ice covered stairs. And even with that she still was a trooper and tried to reach her car. But everything was covered under a sheet of ice. After her good sense finally kicked in, she decided to bring her cute waddling butt right back home.
Needless to say I was very happy. She goes into the next room to call into her job and lets her Boss know that she just couldn't make it in. Considering the circumstances I expected that it wouldn't raise any eyebrows. But when she got off the phone, she seemed upset. When I asked what was wrong? She said her Boss sounded a little annoyed.
Guys, you know how I am. I said "Oh F'ing Well." (Excuse my French.) What did he expect her to do? Part of me was in a rage and the other part felt this overwhelming feeling of guilt, as if I worked for her boss. I guess it brought me back to a few months ago when I was still working for "The Man". I hated calling in for things like that or family emergencies because you would always get that funny look. You know that look, it's the one you give your kids when they're acting up in public.
In any event when I was still an employee I was very lucky to have a great manager so he never made me feel a way. But it was the people above him and even some of my super corporate counterparts that made me feel uncomfortable.
My wife is already stressed out trying to figure out when she needs to leave work so that she can still receive an extra check during her maternity leave. Between that and this recent situation with her Boss, it really lead me to feel that pregnant women shouldn't be forced to work or even worry about things like maternity leave. This is why working at home is so important. Pregnancy is stressful enough especially for new parents like ourselves. But when you add the stress of work on to that, it just doesn't make for a good experience for anyone.
I'm praying there is a day when we all can work at home but especially pregnant women. I think it's totally unfair that they are put in compromising situations because they've made a decision to start a family. It's a sad day when women have to choose between family and careers or in my wife's case her freaking safety.
So I'm more determined than ever to ensure that we're all able to work at home in one capacity or another. Because I'll be damned if my wife or any other women are put in these situations.
Sorry for this venting post. But I had to get that off my chest. Has anyone else experienced these situations or am I just overacting and being an "Angry Black Man" (lol)?
16 thoughts on “Why I Think Women Shouldn’t Work…”
@eddysalomon with the birth of my new child and the lack of the opportunity in the state i live in, I really need a better financial situation. I was wondering if you could personally recommend sites or online places to go that I can earn a realistic amount of money within the next 2 or 3 months. Thanx!
Sorry to hear about the tough times you’re going through. Congrats on the new child though.
In terms of your question, no I don’t know of a place where you can earn a realistic amount of money in 2-3 months. Realistic income usually means having a job to people. So landing a job will really depend on your skills, if they’re in demand in this work at home industry and the competition. Unfortunately it’s no different than trying to find a job offline.
I actually wrote an article about this here:
I encourage you to read it.
That being said we do list real jobs here daily on the following page:
I also have some recommendations of non-traditional opportunities that can help you earn money right away but it won’t be a lot but it’s a start until you can land a job online:
Hopefully this gets you started in the right direction. Everything you need to succeed is already on this site. But like anything else it will take time to see the results you want. Hope this helps.
Thanks for chiming in. I’m sorry to hear about your situation. Honestly I wish I could tell you there is an instant solution that could make you money right away, but I don’t know of one otherwise I’d tap into it anytime I needed money. lol
But you want to try some of the things in the following articles:
Hopefully that will give you some places to start. But finding a work at home job takes time. The only other things I know that can make you decent money involve affiliate marketing and that requires some investment initially and even then it’s not instant money.
Hope this helps somewhat.
Hi, desparately seeking help I’ve stumbled upon your page. I’m trying not to freak out. I left my job and though that has been the best for me stress wise, it would have been better if I’d had spent more time finding this stuff out. So the big bad wolf blows on the house and that is stressful.
But that is nothing to the total terror that I’m going to take my hard earned money and flush it down the drain. I have to make income. [extreme urgency here]. Easily 90% of the sites I come across are please buy our programs. I don’t have it to buy it. I know this is possible. But right now I need some ideas that will generate money real soon so I can pay base bills. Can you help? It is late right now. Any help would be good.
Congratulations on the baby. Leisha
Thanks for your kind words. Not sure if I’m as convinced as you that I’ll be a great dad, so I’ll need all that luck you wished me. =)
Congratulations on your first child as well! You must stop by and share your experiences when the baby arrives!
I feel your pain J. It’s really bothering me that women have to go through this. Hopefully in time you can try to apply some of the advice I provide in terms of work at home opportunities so you can work at home full time as well. This way, the whole family can be at home raising the kids together.
At least you’re actively looking and want a work at home job so you’ll probably achieve it. My wife has no interest in the subject matter at all. lol
So keep trying to secure a position or try some alternate work at home opportunities like the ones I mention in my article.
I recently discussed medical transcription and one of my loyal subscriber Brenda ran with it and seems to have secured a job already and hasn’t even started her classes yet. =0 You can read about here story here:
In any event, great to hear from you J. Don’t be a stranger. Please keep us updated about the pregnancy and your work at home progress.
This is a great post! I’m six months pregnant with my first baby, and I work about a half hour away from home, and my husband works from home. And he feels much the same way you do.
I agree with you 100% and I wish I didn’t have to work when the baby comes. Unfortunately, we cannot afford for me to stay home after my maternity leave runs out. And my job is one that can’t be done off-site (from home). I’m really worried about it, but thanks to taxes being as high as they are, we have little to no choices.
You sound like you’re going to be a great dad – best of luck to you!
Thanks for your comments. I’m glad I wasn’t the only one that felt that way.
And you’re right we as guys have no clue. =)
I just try to fight my natural instincts to say or do stupid things around this time. Like right now I’m having tons of problems getting any sleep at night because apparently being pregnant makes you snore, not to mention she’s taking up more space on the bed with here cute round self. =)
So I just have to shut up and toss and turn all night until I finally get so tired that I knock out. I always have to remind myself, she’s carrying our first child and she’s way more uncomfortable than you’ll ever be. Plus you work at home. You can sleep all day so shut up and suck it up. lol
I’m with you on this one.
When my wife had our first child we were fortunate that she worked for a boss who was understanding.
About 6 months after having our daughter, my wife decided she wanted to stay home and focus on the baby. I supported her in this decision. She did some data entry work from home for about a year until we had another girl. Since then, my wife has been able to stay home and devote time to our children.
4 children later, we are still here with no regrets. I’ve since been able to “work from home” myself. With the workload, however, my wife has done a tremendous job in helping me with things that she can do (usually when the kids are sleeping).
When the children grow older and want to be out more, I know my wife wants to get back into an outside working environment, but for now, she’s happy being home with the kids. (most of the time) 🙂
You’re a good man for that and I agree with you being sensitive toward your wife in this time of her life. She REALLY needs it.
Us guys have no clue do we? 🙂
Glad to shed a little light on your situation Sharlene. We all go through down periods. Some worst than others. I know this blog isn’t about religion, self help and all. But Joel Osteen has this wonderful metaphor that has helped me during many bad times.
He likens life to seasons. There is a season of planting where the ground is bare, hard and just covered with dirt. Looking at that dirt you can’t phatom that something will grow out of it. It looks lifeless and dead. Then in time, after patience and nurturing you have a season of a bountiful harvest. That dead hard earth has turned into lush and plentiful crops.
The point is we can’t get to the harvest without the down and dry period first. A farmer knows this and so they are patient and don’t let it get them down. Because they know in time the harvest will come.
So sometimes we have to look at our lives like that. Sometime the seasons take longer than expected but they do come.
You gotta shake the junk out of your mindset. It all starts there. When you’re feeling down, do things that make you feel good about yourself. Preferably healthy things like watching a great movie, enjoying a walk in a park, taking a vacation, talking to someone positive in your life.
Don’t surround yourself in situations or people that continue to make you feel bad. Sometimes it means distancing ourselves from the closet people we love but it has to be done so that you can come up and then eventually help them.
Trust me it starts with your mindset, then other things start falling into place. I know it sounds so abstract. I’m skeptical and cynical by nature being from the bronx. But doing what I’m suggesting here is what’s changed my life around so quickly in the last year or so. I never realized how my mindset kept me back.
And I’m not saying its the only thing. You can’t live or eat on just a positive mind set. But with one you’re able to see little opportunities that you’re more likely to act on. Then bigger opportunities reveal themselves to you and again because you have a better mindset you’re able to see them and act them.
When people have negative mindsets they can’t see these opportunities when they are presented to them. So then they continue to repeat negative actions which lead to the same bad situations. And I’m not blaming people for their own bad situations. I’m just pointing out a little way that I’ve seen help me and those around me better themselves when applied.
So that’s my advice to your Sharlene. I’m giving you the advice that I gave my best friend, family and people I love. I’ve seen great changes in their lives when they’ve taken that first step. Nothing happens without action and the first action is to change our mindset.
Know that you deserve better than what you’re getting. Know that you will succeed. It’s not a matter of if, it’s a matter of when. Yes sometimes its going to seem damn near impossible but it can happen. Just take baby steps and learn to appreciate the small blessing that you have in your life. Too often we overlook those things.
I get a nice close parking space, I say a quiet thank you inside. I get the empty line at the supermarket, I say a quiet thank you inside. Next thing you know you’re able to see and get bigger opportunities. But it starts small.
I hope this helps. I hate to sound all preachy and stuff. But I felt very compelled to say what I had to say. Hopefully people won’t hold my preaching against me. lol
Keep your head up Sharlene.
We’ll be here for you.
Stay positive and try some of the things I said in this post.
Thank you again Eddy,
You don’t know how much better that makes
me feel right now to hear you say that.
I really do appreciate all of the support
you give. It is well needed from me right
now. And I too beleive people cross paths
for a reason.
You are a “God sent” to me.
If I went into detail as to my personal
problems, you probably wouldn’t beleive
it. I feel like I could write a best seller
at this point in my life.
Heck sometimes I wake up in the middle of
the night and think I’ve just been having
a bad dream for the last 2 years.
I know there is a rainbow at the end of
this tunnel. I just wish it would show
up soon. Before the stress level kills me.
My prayers and the prayers of others are
Girl you definitely need a break. =)
When you’re searching like that for such a long time,
you get in a daze. Trust me I know. I was doing it for years. lol
You need to step away some you can come back with a fresh look. Why do you think people take vacations? They need to re-charge. Searching for work at home jobs is exhausting and it’s like having a full time job without the pay!
So definitely take a break. You’ll be better off. Trust me when you do that, things are a lot clearer.
But don’t give up. It is possible to work at home, if I can do it then anyone can. It may not necessarily be the path that you think it is.
Lord knows I never thought I would be running websites helping people and making money doing it.
So sometimes it’s not the path you have in mind. I’m a firm believer that nothing happens by chance. People are brought into your life for a specific reason. And I’m hoping we’ve crossed paths so I can help you finally work at home. So just take a break and relax. Sounds like you need it.
We’ll be here waiting for you when you’re ready to get started again. =)
Thank you Eddy,
Am anxious to get the scoop.
I will be checking back with you
periodically to find out all the
info. you have for us. I am still
looking, haven’t found anything
steady yet. But I haven’t had the
time to put into searching as much
lately. Things get too hectic sometimes.
I have been searching for 15 months now
and I think I need to take more breaks.
I was spending 30 to 40 hrs. a week looking
for the right “JOB” working from home. I
think I’m starting to get a little burnt
out. I swore I would not give up, and I’m
not, just need a little breather sometimes.
I hear ya Sharlene.
My wife feels the same way about her students. She loves them to death. But it should be interesting to see if she’ll have the same energy with them when our little girl arrives.
I keep telling her when our little girl arrives, working at home is going to sound a lot more appealing to you and you’ll want to stay home with me. lol
I’ll definitely let you know when my little princess arrives.
In any event, don’t let up on the search Sharlene, you have a distinct advantage over most work at home seekers because of a lot of the information you’re learning here on this blog. And I’m not just saying that because it’s my blog. lol
Many of the principles I teach here is basically what helped me finally escape the rat race so just keep on keeping on.
In the next few weeks I’m going to go into more depth about the one work at home opportunity that allowed me to be totally free and it wasn’t a data entry or typing job. =)
yes, that does make sense.
I am the same way. I am a manicurist
by trade, have been a licensed nail
technician for 19 years and I love
the contact with my clients. Most of
them have become very close friends
and have seen me threw some tough times.
This is one of those tough times that
is why I need to find supplemental income.
Hopefully from home so I can still be
there for my clients.
Good luck with the new arrival, you’ll have
to let us know when the tiny tot arrives.
Talk to you soon.
Great question. My wife is a social worker and likes face to face contact. It’s hard enough getting her to use email. So many of the work at home jobs that she could do just don’t appeal to her.
So that’s pretty much why my wife doesn’t work at home.
But we’ll see if that changes when our baby gets her. I’m trying to get her involved with my sites but again she’s more of a face to face person.
So we’ll see.
Hope that makes sense.
May I ask you why your wife doesn’t work from home
now, since you are so good at finding legitimate
jobs from home for the rest of us?